No More Vanity Candidates

Former eBay CEO Meg Whitman has declared her candidacy for governor of California.

Whoopdee shit.

Former Hewlett-Packard CEO Carly Fiorina may declare her run for the U.S. Senate seat now occupied by Senator Barbara Boxer.

Whoopdee freakin' doo.

Maybe it's because I was born and raised here, maybe it's because I'm a fifth generation Californian, but I've decided that given the desperate straits California is in, I'm done with vanity candidates.

What is a vanity candidate, you say? A vanity candidate is a candidate who has no government experience whatsoever and assumes they can not only succeed in an elected position, but succeed in one of the highest elected positions possible, to wit, Governor Ronald Reagan and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.

The problem I have with vanity candidates for governor is this: If you have no experience working in or with a deliberative body, how are you going to get the two-thirds votes needed every year to pass a budget in California?

As much as I respect the accomplishments of Meg Whitman, IMHO, her experience does not translate. Hell, eBay doesn't even have inventory, a supply chain, or stores to manage. It does not have a vast sales force. eBay freakin' sells other people's shit -- over the Internet, no less. Has Meg Whitman ever had to get a majority or two-thirds of 120 ideological yahoos to agree on legislation? If she hasn't, why should she get to have on-the-job training at the expense of millions of Californians? The stakes are just too high to have someone without some form of legislative experience sitting in the governor's office. When a CEO misses earnings targets, shareholders and board members are affected, maybe even employees. When the governor can't get a budget passed on time and the government shuts down because it runs out of money, in-home caregivers, small businesses that contract with the government, and millions dependent on the smooth functioning of this now dysfunctional state are affected.

The stakes are too high.

And did I miss something, but wasn't Carly Fiorina fired? Now, I've "mutually agreed to part" with a job or two, but I didn't then try to run for the U.S. Senate or Governor. Again, the problem I have with Meg Whitman is the same problem I have with Fiorina -- lack of legislative experience, either in trying to get something through a legislature or being part of one. The stakes aren't as high with this position, but I don't think Fiorina's experience translates any more than Whitman's.

If Whitman and Fiorina really want to serve the public, why don't the do as Clint Eastwood did and start small -- run for mayor, city council, school board, etc. Why don't they get their government experience somewhere where they can do the least amount of damage if they fail. Earn our respect for their new accomplishments in government, then run for governor or the U.S. Senate.

The stakes are just too high.

And if you think I'm being political, for the record, I'm not feeling Gavin Newsom for governor, either. Schtupping your friend's wife? I can't get past the eeeewwwww factor. It's not quite John Phillips or Woody Allen-esque, but it's kinda close.